A Love Letter to Maine: Finding My Place in a New Life
Dear Maine,
I knew this move would change me, but I didn’t realize how much until I found myself driving down a quiet road, the trees lining the way like old friends. The air was crisp, the kind that wakes you up and makes you pay attention. And for the first time in a long time, I did.
Love takes many forms, and right now, I’m learning what it means to fall in love with a place, with a new rhythm of life, with the people who make it feel like home. It’s not all easy—there are moments of loneliness, of doubt, of wondering if I made the right choice. But there’s also discovery, connection, and the feeling that I’m exactly where I’m meant to be, even if I don’t have it all figured out yet.
This is my love letter to you, Maine—not just to the place, but to the experience of starting fresh, of finding joy in the unfamiliar, and of letting life surprise me.
The Joy (and Sting) of Starting Over
No one tells you how surreal it is to come back to a place you once knew, only to realize you don’t fit in the way you used to. The landmarks are the same. The streets are familiar. But I’m different now. The kid who walked these roads in high school, dreaming about the bigger world beyond, could never have imagined the version of me that would return decades later.
There’s a beauty in that—returning with more life experience, with new perspectives, with a deeper understanding of what home actually means. But there’s also an emptiness to it. A strange sense of detachment, as if I’m floating between the past and the present, waiting for everything to settle into place.
At first, that feeling was hard to shake. The silence of a new apartment, the weight of uncertainty about where I belonged, the echoes of a life I left behind in San Diego. But I’ve learned something about transition: it’s not about finding an exact replacement for what you had before. It’s about creating something new—and that takes time.
Loneliness as a Side Effect of Change
Let’s talk about loneliness, because it deserves a seat at the table. It’s the thing that creeps in when the dust settles, when the excitement of a big move fades into the reality of everyday life. I don’t care how outgoing or adaptable you are—uprooting your life comes with an emotional price tag.
Some days, I miss the effortless friendships of San Diego. The casual meetups, the inside jokes, the feeling of being woven into the fabric of a place. In Maine, I’ve had to work harder to find those moments. I’ve had to be intentional about putting myself out there, about saying yes to plans, about pushing through the awkwardness of new social circles.
But here’s the thing: loneliness doesn’t mean you made the wrong choice. It’s just part of the process. If you sit with it instead of running from it, you start to see it for what it is—a growing pain, not a permanent state.
And the antidote? Love. Not just the romantic kind, but the love that comes from connection, from community, from showing up and letting people in.
Finding Love in All Its Forms
Love is meeting new people at Maine Street in Ogunquit, laughing over drinks, watching RuPaul’s Drag Race, and realizing that this little LGBTQ bar has become a cornerstone of my new life. Love is the comfort of a familiar face in a coffee shop, the barista who remembers my order, the friend who texts just to check in.
Love is living with Luke, navigating the weirdness and joy of sharing a space with a close friend, finding a rhythm that works for both of us. It’s the way we’ve made traditions out of small things—weekly outings, binge-watching old reality shows, making each other laugh on days that feel impossibly heavy.
And yes, love is also dating. It’s opening myself up to the idea of romance in a place that feels both new and familiar. It’s the excitement of possibility, the vulnerability of putting yourself out there, the reminder that even in a season of rebuilding, there’s room for something unexpected.
Cautions and Advice for Those in Transition
If I’ve learned anything in this process, it’s that starting over is equal parts thrilling and terrifying. Some days, you feel invincible—like you can conquer anything. Other days, you wonder if you’ve made a terrible mistake. That’s normal.
So if you ever find yourself in the middle of a major life shift, here’s my advice:
- Expect loneliness, but don’t let it define you. It’s temporary. Keep showing up.
- Find your rituals. Whether it’s a favorite café, a weekly event, or a quiet moment in a place that feels like yours, routine brings stability.
- Be open to new friendships. They won’t replace old ones, but they’ll bring something fresh into your life.
- Let yourself grieve the past, but don’t live there. Missing what you left behind is okay, but don’t let it stop you from embracing what’s ahead.
- Give love freely, in all its forms. Love isn’t just about romance—it’s about connection, kindness, and investing in the people around you.
The Next Chapter
I don’t know exactly where this road leads, Maine. But maybe that’s the point.
Somewhere between the frost-laced windows of my apartment and the winding roads that carry me through this new life, I’ve realized that love isn’t always a person, a moment, or a single defining feeling. Sometimes, love is found in the in-between spaces—the deep breath before stepping into something unknown, the quiet comfort of a home that is still learning your name, the laughter of a friend who just gets it. It’s in the ache of missing what once was, and the pulse of excitement for what could be.
I came here searching for something—maybe a sense of belonging, maybe a fresh start, maybe just proof that I could do it. But what I’ve found is something even more unexpected: a willingness to sit in the uncertainty and trust that the road ahead will hold me. That somewhere in the echoes of old memories and the whispers of new ones being written, I am building something real.
So, Maine, I don’t have all the answers yet. But I do know this—I am here. I am showing up. I am walking forward, even when the path is blurred. And maybe, just maybe, that’s what love really is.
